Thursday, October 7, 2010

The next four least

I just went to the neurologist for my check up. It has been almost 10 months since my seizure and all looks good. He is pretty sure that I will have no problems and will be able to go on with my life and I will just have to take two pill at bed time for the next four years. Wait... Four more years..
I was hoping to maybe get off these things sooner than that. But he says four years at the soonest if I even get off of then. I am and was a little sad by that but he did say I am lucky that I don't have epilepsy and I get to live my life and drive and go on vacations and have babies. So in that way yes.
Speaking of babies I thought the reason I had these seizures was because of pregnancy but NO IT IS NOT! In fact we have no idea why I had the seizures (two of them) but He does know they are not due to being pregnant. So where does that leave me? Do I just stay unanswered. Do I even what to know or can I even know why.
I am totally bummed and upset by all this. I hate being on pills (the good thing is they are a weight loss pill unlike the others that made me gain). I just don't feel "normal" or like me on them but I guess this is the new me and I need to get use to it.
I will go see my Dr in another 9 months to a year and we will go from there and see if we need to do any test or change anything.
I guess Heavenly Father has a plan for me.. I mean I KNOW he has a plan and I just need to trust that this is part of the plan. I need to pray for help to get over my being upset and just learn to deal with it. I think it is okay to be upset for a little bit right?
Anyways that is my seizure update......


Jenn and Kylann said...

Holy cow Reina! Maybe you can go see a specialist to get this figured out. That's no fun at all. I'm so sorry you have to be on pills for that long. Have you ever had a catscan done at all?

Jen said...

Reina - that sucks, my lovely friend. Pills suck and mystery-illnesses suck and you feel free to be angry and frustrated about it from time to time. Oh, how I know how they suck! But you can do it. You are a stronger person than I am and I have found a way to manage all the suckage and be pretty happy. And you have so much to be happy about! YOU do not suck. YOU are an awesome mom and friend and wife to Will the Thrill (ha, I had to). I love you and PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE feel free to rant at me whenever you get too frustrated with it. Because I really do know how it is and I am more than happy to be a listening ear. Love you so!